My Ultimate Lover

Transitioning from being single to engaged to finally married,💍 where do you find yourself relationally? If you could have the stage you want this very second, could you honestly say you’re ready, or is it the concept of a relationship or marriage that convinces you of readiness? 

This month, on the 22nd of May, my husband and I will mark three years of marriage. 🎉 While this might seem brief, in the context of marriage, we have time under our belts, we’re certified! 💯😆 Lol. Three years marriage time is like ten years so we got a well of wisdom beyond our years. 😉 Growing up, our backgrounds on relationships and marriage differed, so becoming one for the two of us was a profound learning curve. For instance, my upbringing lacked spousal affection at home so anything as simple as holding hands or a kiss in public was deemed weird or wrong to me. 🙅 Whereas in my husband's household that was a normal and healthy expression of love. Our upbringing significantly influences how we treat our partners, for better or worse. My husband and I patiently navigated through each other's learned behaviors and dismantled false patterns of understanding love. 💌

Years before our marriage, I struggled with depression and the notion of marriage consumed my mind. I was fixated on minor things like ring designs and wedding arrangements, overlooking the essence of marriage. It took the Lord to redirect my focus surrounding relationships and show me the correct way. ✞

During my singlehood, I had much self-examination that quickly proved who I was and who I was not. That’s a perk this phase offers. You have all the free time specifically catered to you to heal from past traumas, shed selfishness, and remove toxic patterns.🚮 Recognize that in the single stage, you're not alone, nor should you settle for less than the love you deserve. But that love must first start from within you through Christ. How can we love our partners if we don't love ourselves? And how can we love ourselves without acknowledging the endless love from our Creator? 🙌 We must first unite with Christ before our spouses and watch how seamlessly everything flows. 😊

When my husband and I got engaged it was a joyous day, 😮💖 that swiftly transitioned into marriage. We got engaged that afternoon, and we were married by night. All a surprise to me and I would not change anything within that day as it was perfect. 😍 The overwhelming peace I felt in saying yes affirmed how pleased the Lord was with our decision. Had he asked me years ago with the doubt and uncertainty within myself, I would have surely said no. But the Lord‘s timing is perfect. To those engaged, if you're blessed with peace regarding your choice, embrace it! To those having doubts, seek wisdom that the Lord will reveal which choice is right for you.

To the "I do" crew, how's married life treating you? 👫 Whether it's been mere days, months, or years, the foundation of a marriage can determine how solid the rest of the relationship will be. Our vows bind us to uphold our commitment with unwavering strength. 📃 I can recall a period of recovery after giving birth, where my husband was in a horrible car accident and every vow I spoke began a literal reality of testing. 🆘 In sickness and health, I do, for richer or poorer, I do. It was extremely hard, sleepless nights, the baby crying for more milk, 🍼and doctors creating a revolving entrance to our room,🚪 I thought we’d never get out of that hospital. 🏥 

In the times when everything was stressful and I wanted to quit, 😭 I had to remember the words, “I do”. In sickness and health, I do, for richer or poorer, I do. What I thought would tear our marriage apart, actually made our family stronger. 💪 I was able to care for my husband and son with strength I didn’t know I had, all while upholding my sacred vows to the Lord, my husband, and our family. It was not my own strength but directly from the Lord. 🙌

Regardless of your relational status, what covenant have you made with the Lord? Does your heart align with His love,🤍 or do you search for fulfillment in misguided avenues?👎 Let God be your ultimate love, yield your hearts to Him. While our earthly connections may reflect Christ's  love, none can rival the entirety of love He offers. 🙌 This love demands your willingness to embrace it. Are you ready to vow your commitment to His? 

Are you ready to say "I DO" to His eternal ways? Prepare now as the Lord is ready for you. 

See you on the next blog Wednesday! 

You are a bloomer. Bloom baby bloom, with me Tee! 😌